Jennifer Jane was born on June 29, 1974, at Fort Riley Kansas. At the time I was a young soldier stationed at the base. For two weeks prior to Jennifer’s birth, I was with fellow members of First Southern Baptist Church of Junction City teaching in our children’s Vacation Bible School (VBS). VBS, because of its size, was held that year in Lincoln Elementary School which was not air conditioned which became a challenge to all attending- adults, youth, and children alike- because of the heat inherent in prairie summers. In fact, 1974 proved to be one of the hottest recorded in Kansas history which after Jennifer’s birth had 18 straight days of over 100 degrees.
I came home the evening of Friday
June 28 to our small apartment in the extreme southern portion of Junction City
which overlooked Interstate 70 announcing to my wife Karen that I was tired and
was looking forward to sleeping on Saturday morning. Our baby (no gender
reveals beforehand in those days) was not due until Jully 2 so we both figured
that I had time to recoup my energy before our baby’s arrival. But our darling
daughter-to-be had other ideas. All
through the night Karen’s contractions became closer and closer until finally
she had an announcement of her own- that it was time to proceed to the base
hospital.
So as calmly as I could I loaded
our necessities in our car and drove to Irwin Army Hospital. Remembering that
it was Pay Day Night at Fort Riley which caused some soldiers to run havoc in
downtown Junction City which lies in the most direct route to the hospital, I
plotted an alternate route, I drove east on Interstate 70. Crossing the bridge
over the Republican River I hit a bump that nearly caused Karen to give birth
right then and there. We entered the base by way of the army airfield thus
avoiding the Pay Day mischief and the hospital was nearly in sight.
Sure enough, the maternity nurses
confirmed Karen’s diagnosis and she was admitted. Our baby girl arrived after
dawn on a beautiful sun-filled hot day. We named Jennifer Jane which means
“God’s chosen fair lady.” The name in part honors Karen’s mother Genevieve
since Jennifer is deflective of Genevieve. Her childhood nickname became JJ and
very briefly Jenny Jane and then back to JJ, As she grew older, she was called
Jennifer and then simply Jen.
After three days I brought Karen and Jennifer home. Two
worries filled our minds the remainder of the year, First, we were concerned by
the phenomenon among infants called Sudden Death Syndrome. When JJ was asleep,
we often poked her to ensure she was alive; the trick here was to poke her
without awakening her, Our second concern was the colic JJ developed. I rocked
JJ seemingly for hours on end to try to relieve her pain which would allow her
(and her parents) to sleep. Yet a highlight of JJ’s first months was when Karen
and I dedicated our baby girl to our Lord Jesus Christ and dedicated ourselves
to be model Christian parents during the morning worship service one Sunday at
First Southern Baptist Church in Junction City.
Days turned into weeks into months
and soon it was the summer of 1975. We celebrated JJ’s first birthday in a
Junction City park and soon thereafter I received orders to report to a unit in
Germany. I reported to my unit on my 25th birthday and after a few
days I became so lonesome to see Karen and JJ I began to circumvent military
protocols to get them to Germany sooner than later. Somehow it worked and while
the details are foggy, I met them at the Frankfurt airport, and we settled in
our apartment on the German economy until we could move into base housing some
months later.
JJ inadvertently revealed part of
her character to me at our base preschool in Germany. When I picked her up
early one day, she was eating lunch, so I waited and watched while she ate, not
noticing me- but I noticed how determined and focused she looked while eating
her spaghetti.
Her determination could also lead to stubborn streaks. Once
at an army unit party she was going to drink some refreshment referred to as”
cannon blast” (“cannon” because ours was a field artillery unit and “blast”-
well I will leave that word to your imagination!). Instead of the regular
juice- JJ was insistent on tasting the cannon blast so I had to pry each little
finger of her hand off the cup she was holding.
Then I served on the staffs of four
churches, primarily as a Christian educator. I was very busy with my career ups
and downs, nevertheless I made time to teach Jennifer to swim and to drive, and
I coached her in soccer. Karen taught Jennifer cooking and sewing skills as
well.
Jennifer came home one day when she
was a fifth or sixth grader, and told her mother and me that she wanted to be a
crossing guard at her school in the DC suburbs of Virginia- thinking it too
dangerous we told her no- however, she persisted; finally one day I asked her
why she wanted to be a crossing guard- she replied in no uncertain terms
“Leadership!”- that sounded good enough for me so we relented (years later she
told me that she gave the answer that she thought would move me to change my
mind).
I also had the privilege of
baptizing JJ. One Wednesday evening at our church in Glen Burnie Maryland her
Mission Friends lesson was about helping others in Christ’s name so she thought
the best way to help people was by becoming a Christian, which she did at the
age of eight,
After Jennifer graduated from
Shawnee Mission North High School where she was a scholar, star debater, and
soccer player, she entered William Jewell College in nearby Liberty Missouri. At
Jewell she majored in political science and international relations, and at
Jewell Jennifer became lifelong friends with Cindy, Javette, Amy, Heather, and
Janna who were steadfast with her major transitions in her life and death. Jen
also traveled throughout Europe.
After Jewell Jennifer entered
Baylor University in Waco Texas to engage in graduate study in international
relations and then she returned to our then-home in Overland Park to enter the world
of work. Highlights of her employment included being a research analyst at a
major Kansas City law firm, assistant general counsel in a communications
company, and editorial assistant to a fashion blogger. Jen also received her
MBA from Rockhurst University.
When she met Kerry Classen at a
community Bible study, a new love was in the air, and I had the honor of
co-officiating their wedding. The rest, they say, is history as Jen became a
devoted and loving wife and partner to Kerry, and mother to Nicholas and
Caroline. Karen and I continued to be her “parental unit” (a term Jen first
applied to us when she was a teenager) and while our relationship became more
adult-to-adult, she would remain our first-born “baby girl.”
Then on July 13, 2022, we received
a reality check, a punch to the gut. Jen at age 48 had been diagnosed with
brain cancer. The next year and a half were a rollercoaster ride in a fog.
Surgeries and treatments at the University of Kansas and at Stanford University
provided temporary hope. Karen and I shared our pain with our church members;
they offered up prayers, words of encouragement, and actions which ministered
to us. I enlisted a larger group of partners; in the end we had old friends,
new friends, old colleagues, Johnson County suburbanites, Oklahoma farmers,
immigrants from Myanmar, and theologians, among others, praying for Jen.
And I told God that this situation
was unnatural- children should bury their parents not parents burying their
children. But God showed me in no uncertain terms first through the story of
Job and later in the prophet Habakkuk in the Hebrew Scriptures that He, not me,
defines reality. God also comforted me with a bit of Hebrew wisdom found in
Psalm 46.
On Sunday, Mach 17, 2024, Karen and
I sat with Jen so Kerry and Caroline could attend church. We brought her an Egg
McMuffin sandwich, hashbrowns, and a large Coca-Cola for breakfast which she
always enjoyed. We watched our church’s worship service on television followed
by two Hallmark-type romance movies. Jen was lucid, engaged in conversation,
and followed the movies’ dialogue very well. One week later she passed away.
By Thursday, March 21, Jen was
confined to a hospice bed in her dining room due to her rapid physical decline.
Several times that day I watched over her and we had several very brief
discussions and our talk revealed important aspects of her character. Our
initial discussion involved me holding her hand and saying, “We’ve been through
a lot together, haven’t we?” To which she replied, “Yes, we have.”
Then after a brief time, Karen was
returning from an errand after buying Jen some much needed items. I simply told
Jen, “You know, your mother loves you very much.” She simply replied, “Yes, I
know.” And finally, Jen questioned me with, “What’s wrong?” when she apparently
saw me with a worried look. Not wanting to alarm or upset her, I replied,
“Nothing, I was just thinking.”
Jen’s character revealed in those
three conversational snippets showed that she had forgiven (or had forgotten)
my mishaps, follies, and errors I had made as her father, and that she loved me
in spite of myself. That she was devoted to her mother, her nurturer of our
family who had known her at least nine months before anyone else. That she
cared about others in spite of her own pain and suffering. And during our talks
that solemn day Jen had a smile, a faint smile, but a smile, nonetheless. Hers
was not a smile of the clueless nor one of deceit; Jen’s smile was a confident
reminder about earthly life and her soon-to-be resurrection. She was so brave
and courageous!
Death claimed our beloved darling
daughter shortly thereafter at 1:45 am on Palm Sunday, March 24, 2024, a few
months shy of her fiftieth birthday. Jennifer Jane had lived up to her name and
indeed was the divine gift to us for nearly a half century. Yet death’s grip
was very short lived- as soon as she was released from her temporal bonds Jen
was, and still is, in the presence of the Christ and the Great Cloud of
Witnesses who had gone on before her and cheered her on as she grew into God’s
Chosen Fair Lady. And we shall see her again!
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